We could have written a whole lot of small legal print but we know you fib anyway when you click on that little box saying you read the T&Cs when you actually didn’t. Then as a small business we have to hope that one day all that small print helps us out when someone throws a really, really big tantrum.
But we hate small print so instead we have chosen to spell it out for you in big, simple words at the risk of some bunny (go read the safety page) one day having a go at us and us then regretting not having the small print. So please don’t be “that person” and instead use your brain, have some morals, always talk to us first and most of all don’t ruin it for everyone else.
1. You could get hurt, injured or die! Yes … seriously …. have a think about that. If you drive a car it’s one of the most dangerous activities you experience on a daily basis. It’s a real risk that you face everyday but probably never bother thinking about it. Sports = Risk, you voluntarily accept these risks (freely and wilfully) when you choose to participate in our events. You are also solely responsible for determining whether an event is suitable for you or your child. In other words discuss with your Doc your medical conditions and level of fitness and assess the risk for any planned events. Take some responsibility for your own mess, don’t go blaming us when you blow a calf walking up a hill. And definitely don’t blame us if your property gets damaged. If you stack it on your bike then take ownership for that (its part and parcel of the sport), if you drop your phone in the lake while kayaking then that’s on you and if your bag gets pinched then blame society not us.
2. Listen to your instructor! If they tell you to do something then do it (“put your helmet on”), if they tell you not to do something then don’t do it (“don’t pat the echidna”), if their instruction is something you can’t or shouldn’t physically do then tell them (“get in the kayak”… but sir I can’t swim). If you turn up noisy, drunk, threatening or unruly you will be asked to leave and we will suggest you finish your session where you probably started it, i.e. back at the Pub. Even if it’s not because of alcohol we are in the business of teaching children good sportsmanship and don’t expect them to be exposed to anything less than what we consider to be outstanding human behaviour. While we are at it we also don’t accept you picking on, belittling, calling names, bullying or generally being nasty to any other participants that may be attending the same event as you (this applies whether you are 4 or 44). In a world where you can be anything we ask only one thing from you, be kind (to other people, the dog, the tree, the equipment, the planet, and sometimes even yourself).
3. No refunds unless the event is cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances. Repeat after me no refunds. If you’ve made a booking but don’t set your alarm that’s not our fault. If you’re a parent and you’ve double booked your child with little Jimmy’s birthday party, that’s not our fault. If you look out the window, it’s raining and you don’t feel like getting wet, that’s not our fault. If Grandma passes away unexpectedly, that’s not our fault but for this last scenario we are compassionate and empathetic and will probably book you in to another session or event. In fact we will do booking alterations if you give us enough advance notice. We understand that life can get crazy sometimes and the best laid plans don’t always work. So whilst we have a no refunds policy we are willing to work with you and will rebook for another date but you need to let us know 7 days prior to the event AND we can’t guarantee there is another event exactly the same as the one you first booked. As in sometimes we have one off events, so don’t be silly and expect a rebook for that sort of thing.
4. We may have to cancel because of extreme weather, a zombie apocalypse, bushfires in the area, lake closures, really sick instructors (sick as in illness not ‘sick’ as in good) or an array of other reasons. Or it could just be a simple case of not enough participants. Don’t get angry with us, we will refund, reschedule or rebook depending on the circumstances.
There is so much more we could have written, but this is already getting too long, so please don’t make us regret it. Be nice, play nice, be reasonable, don’t sue us and in return we promise to always try our best.
